god it feels like it's 4000 degrees outside because of the humidity after our very brief downpour earlier today and you know how i hate that feeling especially when it's cramp time...and even when it's not. i should live in siberia.

so here i am dizzy and crampy and burning up and trying to do some reading and cleaning...but mostly i'm just in a lot of pain and i hate this, i really hate this. but everything isn't all bad. after all, i located a little bit of funding for the summer, i have a full committee again, things are going well with my textile art work...but still...that voice inside keeps repeating its mantra...don't fuck this up, don't fuck this up, don't fuck this up...