11 years here on heaven and hell...11 years to reflect on whether or not i've made a positive difference to anyone in this world in any of the many jobs i've had, wearing any of the hats i've worn. and that's a hell of a thing to think about. let's let some NIN/johnny cash in on the conversation...i'll just let the words tell you what i'm feeling, this time without interjecting...i hurt myself today
to see if i still feel
i focus on the pain
the only thing that's realthe needle tears a hole
the old familiar sting
try to kill it all away
but i remember everythingwhat have i become
my sweetest friend
everyone i know goes away
in the endand you could have it all
my empire of dirt
i will let you down
i will make you hurti wear this crown of thorns
upon my liar's chair
full of broken thoughts
i cannot repairbeneath the stains of time
the feelings disappear
you are someone else
i am still right herewhat have i become
my sweetest friend
everyone i know goes away
in the endand you could have it all
my empire of dirt
i will let you down
i will make you hurtif i could start again
a million miles away
i would keep myself
i would find a wayso much guilt...so much self-hatred...so much wrong...