Friday, July 31, 2009

i suspected someone from the media would find it on google...5am [saturday] morning, [friday] night, far from sleep...after the walk of shame...i left when he'd passed out asleep...i'm still up and [walking], can't go home obviously...i drove hours through nearby west virginia after taking the walk of shame...it was me and a gun and a man on my back
and i sang holy holy as he buttoned down his pants
i'm not sure what i sang in my head that night but i remember doing the same...no gun...just overpowered...at least i think...hope...i'm still here...you can laugh,
it's kind of funny the things you think times like these
like i haven't seen barbados so i must get out of this
you think of anything but when it's happening to you...you have to...yes i wore a slinky red thing,
does that mean i should spread
for you, your friends, your father, mr. ed
actually i think i had jeans and a t-shirt...it was the beginning of grunge...and i know what this means, me and jesus a few years back
used to hang and he said its your choice babe,
just remember
i don't think that you'll be back in 3 days time
so you choose well
tell me what's right,
is it my right to be on my stomach of [name unknown] [dorm]
yes...i was always depressed...funny how you never see it in the ones it hits the most...i never attempted suicide...although the theme from *mash* says it's painless...and do you know [virginia]
where the biscuits are soft and sweet
these things go through your head
when there's a man on your back
and you're pushed flat on your stomach,
its not a classic cadillac
no it was a mattress on the floor but tori's story is not mine...there are always differences...me and a gun and a man on my back
but i haven't seen barbados
so i must get out of this
i haven't seen barbados
so I must get out of this
nor have i seen the pyramids, paris, tokyo, the antarctic, syria, south africa...so many other destinations in this world...it's not my time as the surgery that i went into cardiac arrest and then came back to live seems to have suggested...i must have more work to do in this life...[lyrics by tori amos]and in case you were wondering...it was no one any of you knew...and no one i knew...and if another person remembers our freshman year in the spring many months later...you said you could tell that was innocent and i said that i was not exactly innocent...and yet i was...i hope you never thought this was you...

and that's all the story i will tell you. there are far too many graphic descriptions of rape on the web and i surely don't want to find my story on a fetish rapist site...

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