all i could do was just put my clothes back on and walk back out, looking right through, right past anyone i passed by and who knows how i was able drive home from there, to the lab from there, to the airport from there. and we just sat there as the luggage went around the carousel, holding and being held and all we can do is wait and all i can do is wonder how long has this been going on and how much longer will it go on and how much longer i will go on, surrounded by yet another pile of handouts and maybe i should think about distributing them myself, you know? everything must go. and, in time, it will. but i don't think that it's time to go just quite yet.