i'm kind of inventing my own genetics version of the kevin bacon game. well, ok, "the game" is what most people call genealogy. but, anyway, i never ventured out too far into my family tree until now. it seems like we've got just about every major religion covered -- so much so that to get both my mother's and father's sides together we either achieve world peace or launch (yet another) holy war. of course while i'm at it, i'm probably boring thousands of people on facebook that happen to see my comments in their home feed.

so where am i now? not with regard to my family...just in general. i really don't know. i know that i'm tired of being sick. and i'm tired of people dying. however the reasons why i'm in illinois right now rather than new york seem to dwindle every day and i wonder if i care anymore about the things that have me turning circles? i just don't know that i do. but is that lack of caring because the roulette wheel landed too far from fate's number for me or just (*just*) because i'm worn out?

it's a silly thing to mention but does it mean anything that i grabbed the proof copy of a survey and on the back wrote up a list of things that i need to *manufacture* in an online game to level up...thus meaning that i've got to go print out that page again. a seemingly small penalty but why haven't i done that yet despite it happening over 24 hours ago?

where does that leave me?